I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
