YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
