Its about making memories worth repressing
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
