I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
This is the high leading the old right now
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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