My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I puked a lego.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
