Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Randomize
