i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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