He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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