I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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