I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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