haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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