I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
