mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
i'm really worried about him.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
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you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
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I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.