nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Operation Purity has been aborted
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize