I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
