I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Dignity is for republicans.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
