Cold hands, warm shart.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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