No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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