She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Houston, we have a squirter
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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