He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit