That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
