32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
