Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
