dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
it's great music for shaving your balls
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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