So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Just invented taco cereal.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
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