Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize