I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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