Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
We need to get me chipped asap
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
