If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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