dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
