he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
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His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
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She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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