THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
