i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
