I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
