I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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