Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."