As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
