Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize