i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Never joke about your clitoris.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
