it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
