I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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