bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize