Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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