handjob tips. give me some.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize