i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
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Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
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How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize