so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I am midnight drunk by noon
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize
