your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
