Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
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