I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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