new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I could fuck to npr.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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